Wednesday, February 11, 2004
Beyond Murphy's Law
Murphy had it right, but only half right. There are lots more laws that govern daily existence. Here's a small sample ( Click here for a fuller list ):
Bevan's Law of Judgement: Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement.
Burke's Gardening Doctrine: All you need to grow healthy, vigorous grass is a crack in your footpath.
Clancy's Marketing Principle: People will buy anything that is one to a customer.
Conway's Law: In any organisation there will always be one person who knows what is going on - this person MUST be fired.
Fifth Law of Applied Terror: If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
Herman's Law: Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.
Hurewitz's Memory Principle: The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to...to...uh...
Kyle's Statute: Horse sense is that quality a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
Malek's Law: Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.
McGowan's Axiom: (a) If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not $19.95. (b) Anything labelled "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" isn't. The label means the price went up. (c) When the label is entitled "ALL NEW", "COMPLETELY NEW", or "GREAT NEW" it means the price went way up.
Oliver's Law: Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Parker's Law: Beauty may be only skin deep, but ugly goes right to the bone.
Preudhomme's Law of Window Cleaning: It's on the other side.
The Reaper's Law: Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
Smith's Precept: Every absurdity has a champion who will defend it.
Tussman's Law: Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.
Xander's Principle: There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.
Murphy had it right, but only half right. There are lots more laws that govern daily existence. Here's a small sample ( Click here for a fuller list ):
Bevan's Law of Judgement: Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement.
Burke's Gardening Doctrine: All you need to grow healthy, vigorous grass is a crack in your footpath.
Clancy's Marketing Principle: People will buy anything that is one to a customer.
Conway's Law: In any organisation there will always be one person who knows what is going on - this person MUST be fired.
Fifth Law of Applied Terror: If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
Herman's Law: Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.
Hurewitz's Memory Principle: The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to...to...uh...
Kyle's Statute: Horse sense is that quality a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
Malek's Law: Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.
McGowan's Axiom: (a) If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not $19.95. (b) Anything labelled "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" isn't. The label means the price went up. (c) When the label is entitled "ALL NEW", "COMPLETELY NEW", or "GREAT NEW" it means the price went way up.
Oliver's Law: Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Parker's Law: Beauty may be only skin deep, but ugly goes right to the bone.
Preudhomme's Law of Window Cleaning: It's on the other side.
The Reaper's Law: Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
Smith's Precept: Every absurdity has a champion who will defend it.
Tussman's Law: Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.
Xander's Principle: There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.
