Thursday, April 08, 2004
Easter today? No way!
I wonder what we would have made of Easter if it had happened in our present-day Western world?
Well, it wouldn't have happened in the first place, could it? Capital punishment has been outlawed most places, and even where it is allowed, brutality of that kind would not be countenanced.
Jesus would certainly have been up before the courts for intolerance towards a religious group, but maybe the religious authorities could have also been charged with hate crimes towards a minority.
The Last Supper would have been under electronic surveillance, under the various terrorist laws. The meeting in the Garden of Gethsemane would definitely have been broken up, as a seditious gathering.
Property owners whose fences were trampled down by the mob heralding Jesus on Palm Sunday would have complained bitterly to the media and whinged that the police were not doing their job. Animal lovers would have mounted a viciferous protest at the indignities suffered by the donkey. The parade organisers would have gone bankrupt on account of the crippling public liability insurance.
Homeowners along the Via Dolorosa would have demanded compensation from the City council to get the bloodstains removed where Jesus and the two thieves stumbled from time to time and splattered their walls....and a petition would be circulated to force crucifixion parades to take a different route next year.
The media would have gloried in the event, with commentators raking over every possible nuance, while completely missing the real point. But the media would have been roundly castigated for showing it on the six o'clock news. Not so much because of the violence, but because Jesus really was completely naked on the cross.
The soldiers would have taken a class action against the government for post-traumatic stress disorder caused by their job, and struck for double pay in future.
But at least the athiests would have been happy - it would have been another victory in the campaign to remove religion from the public sphere!
I wonder what we would have made of Easter if it had happened in our present-day Western world?
Well, it wouldn't have happened in the first place, could it? Capital punishment has been outlawed most places, and even where it is allowed, brutality of that kind would not be countenanced.
Jesus would certainly have been up before the courts for intolerance towards a religious group, but maybe the religious authorities could have also been charged with hate crimes towards a minority.
The Last Supper would have been under electronic surveillance, under the various terrorist laws. The meeting in the Garden of Gethsemane would definitely have been broken up, as a seditious gathering.
Property owners whose fences were trampled down by the mob heralding Jesus on Palm Sunday would have complained bitterly to the media and whinged that the police were not doing their job. Animal lovers would have mounted a viciferous protest at the indignities suffered by the donkey. The parade organisers would have gone bankrupt on account of the crippling public liability insurance.
Homeowners along the Via Dolorosa would have demanded compensation from the City council to get the bloodstains removed where Jesus and the two thieves stumbled from time to time and splattered their walls....and a petition would be circulated to force crucifixion parades to take a different route next year.
The media would have gloried in the event, with commentators raking over every possible nuance, while completely missing the real point. But the media would have been roundly castigated for showing it on the six o'clock news. Not so much because of the violence, but because Jesus really was completely naked on the cross.
The soldiers would have taken a class action against the government for post-traumatic stress disorder caused by their job, and struck for double pay in future.
But at least the athiests would have been happy - it would have been another victory in the campaign to remove religion from the public sphere!
